Love Vaccine Chapter XNUMX Good and Evil (XNUMX)

Nao-chan, who is unconsciously driven to seek a “trauma reenactment,” and Mac-san, who is aware of the zombies of sexual desire and defiant.
This is the worst combination, but is there any hope or a way out?
After realizing that the ``evil'' within myself was sexual desire, I began to pay particular attention to Nao's dissociative symptoms.
Every time, I always ask, ``Did you experience any symptoms of dissociation after your last date?''
Nao-chan will also tell you honestly about that (I think).
If symptoms become more frequent or severe, they must be suppressed.
Fortunately, there are no such signs so far.
Little by little, Nao began to teach me more about her trauma.
I am very careful when asking questions.
Don't try to force your heart open.On the contrary, it will close your heart.
Shortly after we met, he said that his trauma was from being abused by his parents from an early age and being bullied by a female classmate in high school.
After meeting him a few times, he told me about an incident from his middle school days that he didn't tell me at first.
The assailant was a teacher and had been sexually assaulted.
At first, she said, "I was just touched on my genitals through my clothes." .
Mac: "So when you said it was your first time hugging and kissing, it wasn't true."
Nao-chan: “Yes, but it wasn’t what I wanted.”
Mr. Mack: "I'm not blaming you. It was forced, so it didn't count. It means, 'Please buy me the first hug and kiss that I wanted.' I understand that."
Nao-chan: “Yes, thank you.”
It is difficult to deal with traumatic experiences.
Because it is difficult to face the experience, it is simply thrown into the unconscious.
However, speaking voluntarily to someone like this is probably necessary in order to digest the trauma and turn it into a ``normal memory.''
I have no specialized knowledge.He is just a lustful uncle.
Rather than that, perhaps finding out about Nao's past sexual trauma is also to satisfy his own sexual desire.
I'm sure some of you reading this right now feel the same way, right?
Isn't that what you want to know most about what kind of sexual damage Nao suffered?
It's not a sarcasm.That's what it means to be human.
Nao-chan also wants to hear about my past.
So I talked to him about a lot of things.
About my divorce, about my children, about my own illness.
I generally don't talk about these things to other people.
It's my weakness, so I don't want to go out of my way to disclose it, and I'm afraid that my memory will be fixed by verbalizing it.
If you keep it in your heart without verbalizing it, it will fade away someday.
It's the exact opposite of the trauma treatment method described above, but mine is just a sad memory.It's not trauma.
It's for Nao-chan.It can't be helped, I'll take out some things and show them to you.
The feeling of digging out your own wounds.
From Nao-chan, a unique line comes from time to time.
Nao-chan: Thank you for being born, my precious, precious △-san.
It all starts with that kind of writing.
on another day
Nao-chan: "Good morning. Thank you for being alive today."
Tomo.
Wouldn't most men recoil if they received a line like this from a woman they're dating?
disgusting.Creepy.
I don't think so because I know Nao-chan's background.
I'll reply like this.
Mr. Mac: "My precious, precious Nao-chan. I'll repeat the exact same words to you. Thank you for giving birth to me."
Mac: Good morning. Nao-chan, thank you for being alive today.
Parrot back.
Words sent by Nao-chan.In other words, those are probably the words that Nao-chan herself wants.
I have the ability to perceive such things.
The purpose of caring like this is to make Nao-chan do more erotic things, and I hope that Nao-chan's illness will get better, but it's only because I don't want to have a bad aftertaste myself. .
what about?Am I good or bad?
―In this world, there is malice born of good intentions.Good intentions born of malice (Code Geass) ―
Goodwill born from malice.
Some people may say, ``There is no good or evil in this world,'' but I don't think so.
"Good" and "bad", unless we always keep these two in mind, human society cannot exist.Falling into an ethical lawlessness zone.
I won't let it end like this.
I want to somehow rise to goodness.
This feeling must not be due to sexual desire.
If there is someone who judges me to be evil, I would like to question that person.What would you do if you found out that your favorite partner has the same problem as Nao?
Do nothing, don't get involved.
sever ties.
Is it really good?
(Continue)

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