A dating club that's not just sweet and sour (XNUMX)

Hello.I'm Ren.Last time, I mainly described the movements and actions of the mind leading up to the first date.This time, I would like to touch a little on the story after the first date.
 

table of contents

• Motivation and Background of Joining Dating Club: Limitation of Information Collection
• First Dates: Utilizing Your Staff and What You Did to Avoid Wasted 'Second Dates'
• Continuation: About relationships and sense of distance ← This time here!
• Controlling Your Emotions: Having Multiple Parallel Relationships
• Happenings are inevitable: various things happen (^^;; 
• Finally: the risks and rewards of using dating clubs

The importance of the first date: A basic relationship is created. . .I feel

The first date starts with "Nice to meet you" and you start from a place where you have almost no information about each other, so I feel that it is difficult to show "breadth" in the content of the date.

A typical topic on a first date would be:

• Topics related to current affairs
• work
• Hobbies
• Life
• Motivation for joining the club
• Marriage/love
• aesthetic sensibility

… about

Whether you can spend that time happily, whether the other person is interested in you, etc.

In the process, while coming into contact with each other's way of thinking and the expected value of the relationship, thoughts (delusions!?) about the relationship after that.

While making offers to several people, it is natural that there is no range in the content of the first date (because I am stubborn, so I can not provide range!?). I feel that there is also a side that can imagine the relationship between.

I think that the "depth" of the topic that we touched on each other determines the relationship after that, more than whether it was superficially exciting.
 

How different are the relationships? (personal feeling)

With the person who reached the topic of "aesthetic sensibility" and "views on love and marriage" on the first date,

I don't hate even if I contact you frequently,

Or you may receive a daily report from the other person saying "This happened! I did it!"

I feel like there is a tendency for the exchange between dates to be dense. (If you get carried away and contact me too much, I'm sure you'll hate me...)
 

On the other hand, I think that there is a tendency to basically have a dry relationship with people who only talk about superficial topics such as "work", "hobbies" and "life" on the first date.

To put it badly, I understand that the "thank you" after that is important, and it is also a manifestation of the woman's side that she should not get too involved in her personal affairs.

As a result, it happens that the sense of distance does not shrink well.However, does it mean that the distance does not decrease = bad compatibility?I don't think so.

Rather, do you notice the good compatibility part?I think that is an important factor.
 

Is it possible to check for compatibility?

If you meet a few times, the relationship will be almost fixed, so to put it in extreme terms, I think the time given to find a good match is up to the second date at most.

I would like to find out whether the compatibility is good or bad, or to shorten the distance of my heart with the person who is compatible.

It's funny because once you're locked in a place far away, even if you have sex, the distance won't shrink unless you're on a date.
 

Does the subject of your first or second date hit your partner's sweet spot?I feel that there is a lot of luck elements,

I dare say that when I meet some people, I feel that the reaction to the topic of "I like dogs" and "I like cats" has an impact that cannot be ignored.

I myself love dogs, but I think that relationships with women who like dogs tend to be more satisfying.
 

It's a small topic, but in a way it can be said to be symbolic, and I feel like people who like cats and people who like dogs are essentially different characters.
 

Between Dates: A Difficult Distance Due to Easily Broken Relationships

What do you do with interactions other than the so-called clerical contact?I feel that it is quite difficult to find this optimum point.

After all, I think it's a natural world to be cut off as "I don't like anything you don't like" as long as you don't meet someone here as a "lover". (and vice versa)

If you make it too dark, it will become annoying and you can get away with it.

Especially I want to continue with my opponent!If so, how do you go about it?is still a subject of trial and error for me.

No matter who you are, after the first date, when you send something other than office contact for the first time, you will be more nervous than the first date.

Also, do you get a reply after sending?This is also uneasy and uneasy and can't be helped. . .smile
 

And a common mistake is

• Send on LINE (but it doesn't reply for a while / and it's already read orz)
• I finally got a reply!I'm so happy!
• Happily open LINE ・Mark as read immediately... (Tsukkomi) No! !
• Send a quick reply... (Tsukkomi) This is no good either! !
• After that, I can't mark it as read for a while...orz gaku
• And then he goes out on a rampage called "Consecutive throws"... (Tsukkomi) No! !

... and a high school boy who is completely in the prime.It's stupid, but I think that if you repeat this, the thin thread that connects the relationship will be scraped little by little.

You can acquire the skill of "patience" while "doing it" several times, but I think there is an advantage to dating multiple people in parallel in order to make this "patience" "not patience". I'm here.

I would like to touch on this a little next time.

Therefore, it is very rare and grateful to have people who are willing to interact with me at a pace that pleases me.smile
 

Why do you continue to have relationships with dry women?

This is very simple, and it's because it's rare to find someone who can build a "non-dry relationship (although essentially dry)."

I think that if you only stick to a “non-dry relationship,” when you meet a good person, you will fall in love with them, and on the contrary, the damage will be immeasurable when they dislike you.

You can have a good time even if you exchange once every few days or go on a date about once a month. I believe it is possible.

Next time, I would like to write a little more about this area.

Len