A dating club that's not just sweet and sour (XNUMX)

Last time, I mainly described the process of joining and the policy regarding the first date as the "entrance".

This time, I would like to write about the offer and the first date.
 

Choosing a date: The more I know my preferences, the better

Even with the search function, choosing a date from thousands of women is a lot of work.When I first joined, I simply thought, "It's wonderful to have so many options."

It's true that it's great to have options, but in the process of narrowing down the number of women I want to meet, it's time to more clearly recognize my preferred looks.

By the way, the relationship type of the woman targeted for dating is B or C.Even if you narrow it down with such a conditional search, you will find dozens of people (this may be due to Tokyo). . .

From there, look at the profile of the person you care about while looking at the photos. . . .

While using the "favorites" function, even if you intend to narrow it down, a reasonable number will enter.

Since I'm going to have a taste of "unusual", I narrow it down to focus on looks (putting myself on the shelf), but unexpectedly, candidates remain.

That's where "video" comes in.Some people have a gap with the picture.I feel like the video is the final determinant of the offer.

In the end, I offered a consistent trend of ``those with gentle eyes, a healthy and calm atmosphere,'' and I reaffirmed my ``understanding of my preferences.''lol sweat

And after the schedule is set and the date partner is decided, the exchange that makes the staff tired starts from here.smile
 

question the staff

When I look at staff blogs or personal blogs of users, I see a lot of cases where they hit a "landmine" before compatibility.

I want to avoid "landmines".There are wishes (desire? Selfishness?) such as absolutely not wanting to cancel at the last minute, wanting to avoid unreasonable conditions, and wanting to avoid not having a lively date.Therefore, the "long text email attack" to the staff will start.smile

• Past dating feedback: whether or not there was particularly bad feedback
• Impressions of the interview (mainly character aspects, sense of money)
• Whether you were late for the interview
• Possibility of type fraud seen by staff
• Good response to communication from staff
  etc

Ask for answers to each question.I will also ask you a question again in response to the answer from the staff.

] We will appoint the staff who was in charge of the interview and receive the answer. (It's a troublesome guy... sweat lol)

Unfortunately, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get more information about the female character than what was written in the profile.

However, I thought that the presence or absence of lateness and the quality of the response was quite effective information in determining the stance of the woman.

The lower priority of this activity can at least be avoided. . .It may be just that, but at least I have not had to worry about canceling or being late on the day.
 

The first date is finally here. . .up to

In order to make the day go smoothly, I try to ask the following two questions before the date.

1) Meal genre request
2) Disliked ingredients

Also, I will tell you in advance that "only meals are available for the first time" (the reason will be described later).

I will make a reservation for the shop.This is a preparation for me, who is weak in improvisation, to concentrate on enjoying the meal time.smile
 

first date day

I've made offers to several people so far, but I'm really not used to meeting for the first date.

My heart is about to come out of my mouth every time.But I like the tension.smile

It's easy because I decided not to invite you to the room on the first day.smile

Looking at various blogs,

• Invite me to your room on the first day,
• Not compatible with meals
• conditions do not match
• Women are no longer in that mood, etc.
  
  There are many cases where it doesn't work.

I can't stand the awkwardness of being turned down. . .After some self-analysis, I realized that I would not be able to ask her out smoothly, and decided that even if the return on investment would be low, I would still make it my goal to reach a conditional agreement on the first date.

In that case, there is no meaning unless the "match" continues until the conditions are presented and negotiated.It is important not to lose points.

A certain staff member's blog has valuable input that cleanliness is important, so if time permits, I try to change clothes before going on a date.

Frisk is always available.If you think that the first impression determines the success or failure of a date about 80%, you want to avoid "lost points" in the first few minutes.

Also, I have set my rule to zero body touch on the first date.

Women's tolerance for body touch may vary, but the priority is to minimize the risk of "losing points" on the first date.

However, it is not enough to just deal with losing points, and it is very important to ask when and where to talk about future dating conditions.I can't just take a nap.smile
At first, I thought it would be around the end of the first party.

. . .
. . .

In reality, at the first meeting, I realize that it is impossible to talk about dating such as conditions, etc. . .
 

things that don't go according to plan

After all, the after-party becomes a place to exchange conditions, but in the actual results, only about half of the first dates were able to discuss the conditions at the after-party.

After all, it is often carried over to the second date.

The reason is like this.

• The after-party was so exciting that it was almost the last train
• There were circumstances that forced me to open at the first party, etc.

Luckily, I was able to meet all of the people I met (regardless of whether we could agree on terms or not) for the second time.

It's okay to exchange terms and conditions via LINE or SMS, but I think it's better to meet and talk for some reason, so I try to meet face-to-face for reasons that don't make sense.

However, I also experience that whether it will be a continuous relationship from there is another problem.

As a real feeling, I have an image that the first date is an extension until the second time, and the relationship is individual from the third time.
 

Show the conditions?negotiation?

As I wrote in my last column, I "present" the conditions and take or leave.

No "negotiation".If you don't like the terms, the stance is that the negotiations will break down.

There is a reason for this,

• Simply cumbersome: Inventing something like dividing by 2 after a pause presupposes that you're going to throw it away.
• Paid terms are unsatisfying for both parties: they can be expensive for men and cheap for women.
• Relationships Become “Conflict” During Negotiations: Conflict on Terms and then Success?

That's what it means.

In that case, I thought it would be clearer to convey our conditions and say "answer with yes or no".

It's a simple way of thinking that we present conditions that we are satisfied with, and if the other party is also dissatisfied with those conditions, we can say no.

The comfort of not having to negotiate is important for me, a chicken.

I wonder if there are many people who are unexpectedly adopting this way of thinking.
 

Terms agreed!What is the sweet and sour relationship...

Agreed terms successfully! !Then, will the “sweet and sour relationship” be created as the club says? . . ?
I would like to write about that in my next column.

Len