2020/4/14
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Important etiquette course for women who are working as fathers ⑥

 

From the first time we meet, we must be clear about YES and NO.


Among women who are working as fathers, there are probably very few who are not nervous when meeting a man for the first time. Honestly, my heart was pounding.

When I'm introduced to my dad at a dating club, I always think, "It's impossible to meet someone for the first time."It was that.

 

In fact, I think it was only after over a year since he had been a father that I was able to meet him for the first time without feeling nervous.

 

I couldn't get used to that much at first. (Even now, I sometimes get shy depending on the mood of the man.)

 

However, if you have ever been a father, you will understand that negotiation at the first meeting is extremely important.

 

On the contrary, if you fall down there, you may not even receive any allowance at all.

 

No, there's a possibility that there won't be a second time before that.

 

To be honest, there is no point in paying for the first trip (5 to 1 yen) when it comes to daddy activities.

 

But, of course, it's really difficult for first-timers, but also for those who aren't used to it, to negotiate allowances with their fathers.

 

Actually, I went through a lot of trouble, so I know how amazing it feels.

 

What do you struggle with? That's a characteristic unique to Japanese people.

 

I think the majority of women who are working as fathers are shy.

 

So I guess it's okay to just say whatever suits the other person.

 

Wouldn't it be simpler to say that you get nervous and can't say what's on your mind?

 

It goes without saying that women are at a slight disadvantage when it comes to negotiating allowances with their fathers.

 

The reason is that men are more accustomed to it.

 

Moreover, from a man's perspective, it is better to have a lower allowance than a higher one.

 

Therefore, many people naturally set the price low.

 

In my experience, less than 3% of men set an allowance amount that makes them feel good from the beginning.

 

That's how severe it is. (Depending on the father, the request may be refused due to a difference of 1 yen.)

 

So, getting back to the topic, there are cases where women who are not used to negotiating for the first time end up signing contracts with conditions such as benefits that are not good.

 

As a result, within a few weeks of starting a relationship with the father, the woman always begins to complain.

 

that? Other girls are getting more, so why am I so cheap? Just like that.

 

As a result, she is no longer able to enjoy being a father, and her relationship with men also collapses.

 

From the perspective of a man who has become a father, why didn't he say it first? That's what I'm talking about.

 

Naturally, when it comes to dissatisfaction with allowances, it may be assumed that the problem lies with the woman.

 

Indeed, from a third party's point of view, it's clear that it's the woman's fault for not speaking up first.

 

However, it goes without saying that it is unreasonable to expect a 100% perfect negotiation from a woman with whom you are not familiar with anything when you first meet her.

 

Some dads increase the amount of money they spend in their relationships.

 

However, in my experience, this is only true for those who have continued for a long time.

 

Most of them leave midway through.

 

So why does this happen? Is there a better way to do it from a woman's perspective? The important thing is to get into the habit of saying YES and NO clearly, even if you can't say what you really thought from the beginning.

 

For example, discuss conditions from your father, such as allowances, at the first meeting.

 

At that time, if you are too shy to say what's on your mind, it's a good idea to at least tell the other person just YES and NO.

 

That alone is enough to indicate that he is negotiating with his father. (Simple but effective.)

 

Of course, the reality is that there are many children who cannot even say yes or no.

 

However, it is the women who end up losing out if they do not say the first yes or no.

 

The same goes for the allowance part, and it also leads to him not being able to go in the direction of having a good long-term relationship with his father.

 

Also, saying YES NO at the beginning is good manners for your father.

 

After all, it may be simple, but answering first is important when thinking about what will happen later, right? It's also good for the other person.

 

So, if you're too nervous to say what you're thinking when you meet your dad for the first time, it's a good idea to decide on the price and conditions in advance.

 

And if it doesn't fit, say no.

 

However, you need to be careful if you set your conditions too high, as this will hinder your chances of meeting your father.

 

So please do it in moderation.

 

A hug every time you meet is effective

 

Do you all hug your dad when you meet him? I do it every time.

 

There is a reason for this.

 

Depending on the woman, there are various types of girls, such as those with cute smiles, those with cute behavior, and those who are cool but are good at attracting men.

 

Honestly, I don't fit into any of these categories. (It's embarrassing.)

 

So, when you meet with your dad, do you always start off in a bad mood? There are many patterns that can be said to be.

 

Even I feel like I'm always losing money.

 

However, it's also unnatural to walk with your head down.

 

My dad, whom I see every week.

 

Somehow, I want to make each other feel comfortable from the beginning, and I want to give that impression to the other person as well.

 

That may be the truth.

 

Among women who are trying to become fathers, there are surprisingly many who have the same problems as me.

 

When dealing with people, I think it's important as a matter of manners to behave in a way that doesn't make the other person feel anxious or unhappy.

 

As with anything, the beginning is very important.

 

When you meet someone, you can sometimes see their relationship throughout the day from the beginning.

 

But hey, I know how to solve this once and for all.

 

It's a universal hug.

 

This is really useful.

 

In Japan, the reality is that the culture of hugging has not yet penetrated that far.

 

But most men who become fathers are used to hugging. (I think that because he is rich and well-bred, he has absorbed various cultures.)

 

The great thing about this hug is that no matter how unhappy the woman is or how uncomfortable she is at the beginning of the meeting, it makes everything positive.

 

In terms of a man's psychology, he becomes a father to a woman in the first place because he likes her.

 

Do you think such a woman would have a father who would give her a disgusted look when she wanted a hug at the beginning? I'm sure I'm thinking too much when I see your displeased face and give me a hug. I'm sure you'll think so.

 

Hugs aren't just for the beginning.

 

As expected, common sense around the world.

 

You can also use a hug when you want to say thank you on the spot.

 

This body language is perfect for children who are not good at talking.

 

For women who are not used to hugging, it may take some time to get used to it.

 

However, you will get used to it after about 3 times.

 

I had a really hard time learning how to hug.

 

How should I start out with my dad? How can I be as cute and attractive as other women? How can I become good at being pampered? Such.

 

All of this could be solved with just a hug.

 

In addition, hugging leaves a good impression on the other person, so it's a very important element when thinking about etiquette for having a long and pleasant relationship with your father.

 

If you're not good at talking or can't behave towards your dad in the same way as the cute women around you, please give it a try.

 

I feel very regretful, and it makes me different from those around me in a positive way.

 

By the way, ever since I started hugging myself, my dad has stopped saying negative things to me.

 

Writers: 
The shock when I first learned about the dating club was amazing.Since then, I've been hooked.We will continue to transmit reality from a female perspective.

Articles by Kumiko Mine

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